MediaSpace Wiki

Small Group Spring2006 Session07

Index Card Assignment due Thursday

Listen to a conversation that you are not a part of for a few minutes. Do not participate in the conversation at all. Instead, write down three things that you would want to say if you were participating in that conversation.

Agenda

• Discuss Questions
• Lecture
• Discussion of observation assignment
• Answer Questions

Effective Listening = Stop, Tend, Organize, and Respond

• Listening is a critical communication skill
  • That's true in just about any communication context
    • Dyadic face-to-face
    • Large group classroom settings
    • Small group interaction
  • We spend more time listening than talking in any case
    • That is certainly true in small groups
    • Where side conversations and shifts between multiple speakers complicate the task
  • While listening is an important skill, we aren't very good at it
    • most people can only remember half of what they hear immediately after they hear it
    • They are unlikely to remember more than a quarter the next day
• We can learn to listen better by paying attention to two sets of things:
  1. The factors that impair good listening
     • Our ability to think much faster than we talk
       • Most of us can read (300wpm) at least twice as fast as people typically talk (150wpm)
       • This leads us to think about other things instead of giving full attention to the speaker
     • Listening styles lead people to focus on and encourage certain kinds of messages in preference to others
       1. People-oriented styles that focus more on socio-emotional messages
       2. Action-oriented styles that focus more on the task
       3. Content-oriented styles that focus more on evaluation of information
       4. Time-oriented styles that become impatient when messages don't get to the point
       • Each of these styles has value, but the best listeners blend concerns for task, evaluation, and socio-emotional issues
       • When time is short, blending in a concern for getting to the point is important too.
     • People tend to make attribution errors when listening
       • Problems will be attributed to the group or other members of the group
       • Successes occur because of their group skills
     • We tend to listen emotionally
       • We give in to our feelings rather than focusing on what is said
       • We often hear what we want to hear and miss other things
     • People tend to focus on facts rather than ideas
       • Facts are usually meant to illustrate ideas
       • If we focus on the facts, we can easily miss the point.
       • This is a real risk in note-taking.
     • Side conversations may distract us from what is being said
     • Bringing something else to do during the meeting is also a risk
  2. The factors that enable good listening
     • We can structure the environment to encourage good listening
     • We can leverage the speed of thought to listen better
       1. Try to anticipate where the speaker may be going
       2. Focus on and weigh the points the speaker makes. Are there alternatives? Is this valid?
       3. Periodically review and summarize what the speaker has said
       4. Look for what is between the lines
     • Look for the big ideas
       • Try to focus your summaries on the ideas rather than the evidence
     • Work to counter emotions
       • Withhold evaluation
       • Look for the evidence that doesn't make immediate sense to you. Think about it.
• Here's a four step process that can help you listen more effectively
  • Stop, Tend, Organize, and Respond: the Storage Listening Process
  1. Stop:
     • Get rid of distractions
       • Find a distraction neutral location
       • If you have something on your mind, write it down first so you can put it away
       • Keep a piece of paper around you can jot down any distractions on
  2. Tend (attend, pay attention):
     • Focus on the speaker
     • Use non-verbal communication to look like you are looking at the speaker
       • A wonderful side-effect is that this is often a self-fulfilling action
  3. Organize:
     • Look for the ideas the facts and message details illustrate
     • Look for inconsistencies
     • Try to understand the others agenda
     • Create a mental summary of what the other is saying
     • Look for themes that tie things together
     • Note key words rather than sentences or phrases
     • If you take notes, try drawing a picture instead of making a list
       • A mind map:

1. Respond:
   • Provide appropriate and timely feedback
   • Think about what the other person needs
     • Ask questions
     • Provide useful information
   • Reflect content by paraphrasing
     • In your own words
   • Be descriptive rather than evaluative
     • Put yourself in the others shoes: How would you feel
   • Two fundamental values in responding
     • Saying it reinforces the ideas
     • Hearing your paraphrase gives the speaker a chance to catch missing ideas.

• If you listen this way you may STORe what you hear more effectively
• Some reasons to listen
  • It is an effective management tool
    • Human relations approaches are right: people are more productive when they feel valued
    • Human resources approaches are right: people have good ideas and should be valued for those ideas
  • It is an effective sales tool
    • The best way to sell is to understand what the customer wants
  • It is an effective meeting tool
    • It helps keep the meeting on topic
    • It helps the meeting to proceed more effectively
    • It increases participation
  • It is an effective organizational tool
    • Large organizations don't have time to endlessly repeat themselves.
    • When they do so, there should be a better reason than not listening.